


pétale fatale

by JAJAngmyeon



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Angst, Hanahaki Disease, IM STRESSED, M/M, Soonhoon - Freeform, im a dumdum too, non-traditional hanahaki disease, soonhoon im sorry, they’re both dumdum
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-09
Updated: 2019-04-09
Packaged: 2020-01-07 05:46:58
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,845
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18404339
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JAJAngmyeon/pseuds/JAJAngmyeon
Summary: A reverse Hanahaki disease au in which the one who coughs up petals and blood is that someone who can’t return the love.The remedy? Communication.





	pétale fatale

**Author's Note:**

> warning: this is really dumb. im dumb. im really sorry this sucks :( i wrote this so early in the morning bcs im fed up with the blue bird app. im really sorry.

Jihoon opened his laptop excitedly. He’s been waiting to finish all his classes for the day to talk to that one person.

It’s his best friend, Soonyoung.

“Hey, are you up? You look tired,” he said when he saw his best friend’s state from the other line.

Soonyoung lives in Europe. His family migrated there when they were still young.

Jihoon could still clearly remember how much he cried when Soonyoung left him. They promised to keep in touch through letters but unfortunately, they lost all connection when Soonyoung and his family changed address.

They just reconnected again recently when the other went home a month ago to visit their relatives here.

“I’m okay, Ji.”

Jihoon knitted his eyebrows. “Are you sure? You really look pale. I think you should go see a doctor.”

He saw the other guy panic. “No need to worry, Jihoon. I’m just tired from practicing all day,” the other guy reassured. “No one’s bothering you again at uni, right?”

Jihoon rolled his eyes. “There’s this guy who keeps on telling me that my compositions sucks. I mean, he hasn’t even listened to any of it and yet, he’s telling my whole department that I suck? Joke’s on him. I’m close to punching him right in the face.”

  
The other gasped. “Wow, Feisty Lee Jihoon coming through. I was about to tell you that I’ll fly all the way from here to protect you but I think I’m not needed anymore?”

“Shut up! You can’t even protect yourself.”

“That’s when we were still kids, Jihoon! I’m taller than you now and oh! Look at this guns.” Soonyoung flexed his biceps on the camera and the other just chuckled.

Jihoon felt his heart swell. This is the reason why he’s falling. Well, not because of the biceps. But Soonyoung.

Soonyoung.

Everything about Soonyoung.

He’s falling deeper for the person in front of him. He can’t help it.

Kwon Soonyoung has always been that person Jihoon likes ever since they were kids.

  
Yes, he is.

  
“Why are you assigning yourself as Jihoon’s husband, Soonyoung? You are both guys,” one of their friends asked little Soonyoung with bunched up cheeks and slanted eyes.

“Who says two guys can’t marry each other?” Soonyoung pouted. He tiptoed and kissed Jihoon’s cheek that made the latter blush.

“Y-Ya! What are you doing, ShortNyong?” Jihoon used to be the one taller than Soonyoung.

“I’m trying to prove a point here, Jihoon.”

  
Soonyoung is his sanctuary, his safe place, his querencia. Even on the darkest times, he’s always there. Young Jihoon has gone through a lot especially when his parents got separated. But having a Kwon Soonyoung beside him, it felt like everything’s gonna be okay.

  
“Jihoon, don’t cry. I’m here. I will protect you from anything even from this stupid tears,” Soonyoung told Jihoon. They were sitting on the swing.

Jihoon ran there when his Dad left their house.

Soonyoung smiled and it revealed his cute front tooth. Tooth, because he lost his other tooth when he fell from that slide a few days ago.

Jihoon chuckled. “Your tooth is lonely, Soonie.”

The other clapped happily. “I’m glad I made you smile with this tooth.” He smiled again, eyes disappearing, only his front tooth showing.

His best friend chuckled again. “I’m mocking you, idiot.”

Soonyoung reached out his arms to wipe the tears away from Jihoon’s beautiful eyes. “I promise to always make you smile when we grow up, Jihoon. I promise to protect you, too.”

Jihoon felt his heart jump a bit. His ears were burning when he cleared his throat. “Grow up first, ShortNyong!”

“If I grow taller, you’ll marry me, right?”

The other kid smirked. “If!”

“That’s a deal.”

 

Jihoon was lost in his train of thoughts when his phone vibrated. It revealed the chathead of his friend from this dating app he registered to because he was bored.

  
hoshi: hey.  
woozi: ?

  
There’s this guy here he’s been talking since last year. Basically, he’s the reason why Jihoon opens that shitty app. They don’t even know each other’s real names because they both agreed not to get attached to someone on the Internet.

And besides, that Hoshi told him that they might not be able to meet because he lives far, far away. They just enjoy talking. They enjoy telling each other about some shits they went through that day.

It’s relieving having someone you can lean on at the darkest times, right? That’s how Jihoon felt towards this Hoshi. The latter’s presence made him forget this empty feeling inaide of him whenever he thinks about Soonyoung.

  
Did he like him?

  
Saying that he likes him is being hypocrite. Jihoon doesn’t believe in falling in love to someone you know nothing about. So, he doesn’t really know how to answer this.

 

hoshi: have you heard of the reverse hanahaki disease?

hoshi: it’s scary. forcing love sucks.

  
woozi: and knowing that you hurt the one you love sucks too...

hoshi: what will you do when that happens to you?

woozi: ill stop myself from falling. if i really love that someone, i’ll let that person go. i dont want to cause him pain.

  
hoshi is typing...

hoshi: can i ask u smth?

woozi: go on.

hoshi: do u like someone rn?

woozi is typing...

  
The other’s question got him taken aback. But the moment he read that question, he thought of one person only.

woozi: yes.

  
It’s not until the next week when Jihoon felt something on his chest. It was like it’s filled with something.

It was noon when he started coughing so hard. He even went home early from university because he’s really not feeling well.

He looked at the time. Soonyoung is awake by this time of the day but he doesn’t want to see him at this state.

He felt something stuck in his throat. Jihoon immediately ran to the bathroom. He started throwing up.

But instead of throwing up the cereal he ate early this morning, he saw beautiful petals of different colors on the bowl.

“N-No way.” He told himself, in horror.

 

He went to see the doctor specializing in lung diseases the next day.

“You have reverse hanahaki disease, Jihoon,” Dr. Hong told him. “There are two ways to cure that. It’s either you confront the person who likes you and convince him to stop liking you or you can like him back or you have to undergo an operation but it’ll paralyze your capability to feel love, too.”

  
Jihoon froze when he heard the second option. He immediately thought of the guy with bunched up cheeks and slanted eyes. He immediately thought of his smiles and the way his eyes disappear when he laugh. He immediately thought of their moments together.

  
“I’m not going to get any operation.”

 

After a few days, Jihoon felt his body weakening. He’s refusing any calls from Soonyoung. He doesn’t want the other to worry.

“Hyung.”

It’s his brother, Chan.

“Why are you refusing to undergo the operation? Mom and Dad are really worried. They’re starting to ask your classmates one by one if they’re the one inflicting this disease on you.”

Jihoon coughed and this time, he saw the petals mixed with blood. He weakly smiled towards his brother. “I-I can’t. Even on my last breath, I-I want to be able to love.”

“I don’t understand, hyung.”

The older felt his tears streaming down his face. “I haven’t even told him that I love him, Chan. I-I want to tell him that I love him.” Jihoon clutched his chest tightly. “I’m really sorry to whoever I hurt by not returning their feelings but I can’t give up my love for him.”

Chan hugged his older brother.

“I-I don’t want to give up my love for Soonyoung, Chan.”

  
That night, Jihoon dreamt of the day Soonyoung left for Europe. Their eyes are full of tears. They’re hugging each other so tightly like their lives depended on it.

  
“Jihoon, I’ll be back.”

“I’ll go to you when we grow up.”

“No, let me be the one to go to you.”

“No, Soonyoung, I’ll go to Europe and find you.”

 

The next thing Jihoon did is find his passport and ask his mom to take him to the other part of the globe. Luckily, he kept the address Soonyoung gave him when they met again. He put it inside his pocket and clutched his heart.

“Let me tell you how I feel before I left this world, Soonyoung.”

  
Jihoon’s parents allowed him to go with the condition that his mother will go with him because his body is really weak at that moment.

  
“Are you really sure about this, son? Your body is really weak, Jihoon,” his mom worriedly asked him.

  
Jihoon weakly smiled. “I have to do this, Mom. Not being able to return someone’s feelings gave me this pain. But I don’t want to sacrifice my heart. If anything, I’ll always choose to love. I’ll always choose the person I love.”

His mother hugged him. They cried on each other’s arms.

“I’ve kept my mouth shut all this years. I have to say it now. It’s better late than never.”

  
It took several hours before they reached Europe. Jihoon’s body got even weaker. He could even barely stand up. When they finally reached Soonyoung’s address, Jihoon felt his heart jump.

But it faltered a minute later when they talked to his sister who came out from their house.

“Soonyoung is not here.”

Jihoon froze. “W-Where is he?”

“He’s at the—” Jihoon started coughing up prtals with blood. Soonyoung’s sister grew wide. “Wait, you have it, too?”

“W-What do you mean?”

  
On their way to the hospital, Jihoon’s tears are streaming non-stop. Apparently, Soonyoung has Hanahaki disease, too.

  
He felt his phone beep. With blurred vision, Jihoon opened it. There, he saw a message.

hoshi: before i left, i have to tell you this, woozi. i like you. i really really like you. i tried to stop myself from falling but i cant. at first, you just remind me of my childhood friend but the more we talk about our life issues, idk how it happened but i fell in love with you. im sorry. i really have to say this. it’s okay if you won’t return the feeling, i’ll be gone anyways.

woozi, i love you.

  
Jihoon finally realized something. When they arrived at the hospital, with all his strength, he tried to go to Soonyoung’s room in the fastest way possible.

On the hospital bed, he saw the love of his life, lying, pale and almost lifeless. His eyes are closed.

  
Jihoon walked towards him and sobbed uncontrollably.

“Soonyoung-ah~”

The other’s eyes weakly fluttered open.

“J-Jihoon? I-Is this a dream? Am I already in heaven? W-What are you doing here?”

  
Jihoon hugged the other’s frail body tightly. “Soonyoung-ah~ we’re both idiots.”

  
“J-Jihoon?”

  
“We’re idiots, really.”

Jihoon felt his chest getting lighter. He felt the stuffs inside his lungs slowly disappearing.

“I’m Woozi. I like— Scratch that. I love you too, Kwon Soonyoung.”

**Author's Note:**

> what have i done :( IM REALLY SORRY :(
> 
>  
> 
> mimi, this is for you~ sorry if i flopped this one hard. i love you sooo much 💛


End file.
